Help!.....No.

Ola!
I've come across a lot of people who generally confuse a 'favor' with 'help'. So I've decided to give my version on this, not necessarily the most right one. You're the boss of that....

So!!! To start off, lets define what help is according to the dictionary:

help (verb)
1. to save; rescue; succor
2. to make easier or less difficult; contribute to; facilitate

*Ba Dum Tus*

and favor:
 
favor (noun)
1. something done or granted out of goodwill, rather than from justice or for remuneration (nowadays this point is kind of forgotten or held void as people do expect favors to be returned); a kind act.
2. friendly or well-disposed regard; goodwill.

*Ta Daa*

 Well, since the meanings are so clear, we have everything in black and white right ? Yes. 90% of it is actually in black and white, but there is a small gray area where some people confuse a help with a favor. It all boils down to the person who's helping/doing the favor.
Let me illustrate with an example. Now, you're walking down a street, and you watch a sexy lady having trouble with her luggage (her bags and suitcases..you nasty nasty person!)

 

I swear, she is sexy!

You decide that you will go carry her luggage for her, and then you stumble upon this blog and wonder, if you helped her or did her a favor. Well, the answer lies within. Ask yourself, why you did it...was it out of concern/goodwill or was it so that you could get to talk to the lady, and see where it goes. ;)
If its the former then you genuinely helped her. If it was the latter, (you sly dog!) then you just did her a favor (although the meaning says that there was goodwill, when there was none) because you found an opportunity and grabbed it. (I'd do it too :D)

I've mentioned about my tutor, also called "Professor" in my previous posts (Epicrotis). I have a little story to share about him..
I, by far was the dumbest person in the class, didn't know what was going on whilst others were on their ways to get into those top notch Universities. We always were given tonnes of problems to solve, usually everyone except me, did actually solve most of them (If I could manage solving one measly Physics problem from "I.E. Irodov", then it was celebration time at home) but when someone actually had trouble solving something, they never asked Professor to guide them, they always did it on their own, and I followed suit just to not stick out. But there was this one time when Professor in his ever knowing gaze, and all his wisdom, noticed me struggling with my questions, craving for help, and he addressed the class..

"Never ask others for help before you help yourself first. If you can't solve a problem, find out where you are struggling and fix that first. I will guide you, but I won't solve your questions for you."

What he said that day, got etched into my mind ever since, it had a deep and permanent impact in me as a person, and to this day, come to think of it, I've almost never asked for help per se. Yes, I've asked many people for many favors, but never have I asked for "help"...it's involuntary..that thought of asking someone to help me never arose. I don't say that its something only Proud Kings and Emperors would do, in fact it's a negative thing and makes an egoistic bastard out of me because, the world runs only because of the single fact that people choose to help other people, and nothing else.

If you're still confused if what you've asked for is help or a favor, here's a simple trick that can help you discern. Ask yourself, why would the person you asked, do it for you. If your head says, "to facilitate/rescue you" or "because (s)he's a good friend" etc. then you've asked for help. If your head says, "probably because I'd owe him/her one" or "I really don't see why (s)he'd do it for me" etc., then Ladies and Gentlemen, you've asked for a favor. Simple, innit ? I hope that you can at least now.....

Breathe easy. \/